Physician, Heal Thyself

Technically I am a doctor although, by rules of arcane academia, I don't think I can use the title. For a smart guy I can be really dumb though. I hop on my blog and pontificate about engaging and thinking and living ... yet I have 240 unread emails.

The thing is that the emails are not those avoided or unwanted or even spam. They are from me. And no, I am not that egotistical. The reason they are from me is that I use my email as a sort of file folder. Anytime I come across something on the internet that I think I might find useful, I send myself an email so I don't lose it. Most of them are from odd stuff, cars, tools or whatever that I find listed for sale.

I just checked the oldest unread email. Apparently it was mandatory that I keep a record of an ad listing a used cast iron table saw (in need of minor repairs) that was sitting in some guys garage in Lake Geneva. The ad was from November '09. I wonder if it's still for sale?

Of equal import was the emailed receipt from March '10 showing proof that I bought a security pack from Norton after the trial one that came with my laptop from the prior Christmas ran out. You never know when you might forget that you bought something that pops up at you each time you turn on your computer ...

The embarrassing thing is not that I have 240 unread emails. The embarrassing thing is that it was only today, after noticing that I had 241 new emails (meaning to my mind I had 1), after reading that 1 (so that a quick glance would show me if I had any new emails (beyond the 240 new emails)), and after letting my mind wander while I swept the last of the winter weight-sand from the back of the truck (a nicely repetitive task that allows the brain some real freedom), that I realized the sheer stupidity of this habit. How much time and energy have I wasted keeping records of a million possibilities, most of which are no longer possible, at the expense of paying attention to the opportunities God has planned for me? Talk about not being engaged.

So, in the spring cleaning spirit, I have decided to purge. I am going to go back and erase all the unread emails more than one month old without even reading them. For those from the last month, I will read them, delete most, and READ the one's I actually should keep. I think that will be the last area of my life that needs attention so then I can get back to critiquing others' issues without out worrying about hypocrisy.